Capricious Perks of Being a Wallflower

One of the best things about the Christmas break is that I can take time to catch up with my outstanding movie catalogue. There was one movie called “The Perks of Being a Wallflower” that I had been planning to see since I saw the trailer. Luckily it was still in the theatre before the main avalanche of Christmas blockbusters rolled out so I managed to catch it before it dropped off the screens.

Classifying “Perks” as a coming of age movie is a huge oversimplification, for it deals with some quite serious stuff here. The movie dealt with how a teenager tried to fit into the high school culture, but behind the simple façade of this was something more deep rooted and haunting. I personally did feel for the main character as he was being set aside because of medical reasons. How could you get back to your normal life when you were practically living in a hospital for a year and completely disconnected from the people whom you used to know.  I did know someone with chronic illness back in high school but I never felt as strongly as I did now when I watched the movie. Maybe I was too young to understand. I did feel bad for them but I don’t think I did feel for them, which is something quite different.

High school days are scary for most people as this is a time where everyone tries to establish himself. This is a time when we are like curious cats trying to find out everything around us without considering the dangers involved. Some would establish themselves by treading over other people’s corpses, while others might try to live a simple life by staying out of other people’s way. As for me I picked a role I liked and stuck with it. I decided I didn’t want to be considered as belonging to any “groups” so I treaded along the middle line as much as possible. The good thing is then you dodge a lot of bullying bullets because every group knew that any group could come to your help. Not that I would need it as I was quite a feisty piece of work myself at that time with all the raging hormones inside me. Of course taking up that kind of role would mean that you might not get anywhere in terms of status in school but that was the last thing on my mind. I just wanted to be someone I was happy with and I couldn’t care less about what other people thought of me, which is still kind of whom I am nowadays.

In my very teenage worldview at that time, high school was a bigger playground that provided me all the space and facilities I needed to explore who I want to be. The price was comparatively small when things did not work out so it would be silly not to take full advantage of it.  I did have a blast at that time and a lot of things that I learnt and liked still form a solid part of my life now – and that include acting, playing music, being creative and thinking critically. Some people might not agree with me but I firmly believe these aspects of me have made me a more complete person.

In “Perks” the main character had a vision to become a writer to recount his story during this time of his life and eventually he did, although the journey was not a particularly easy one. As for his two best friends, they had their own problems, and they went through a similar ritual but through some different pathways. They might look strong on the outside but they were as battled as the main character in the inside. How did you balance what you want with what you can do? The whole ability side of thing was so abstract at that age that one bound to be disappointed at some point – and to handle those disappointments are quite some lessons to learn. I had my fair share of disappointment during my high school years too, some of which at that time I thought I wouldn’t have survived but then I lived on.

Maybe it is a bit too “tooth achy” when it comes to coming of age especially when we look back at them after we grew up. This is because it felt like that you were the only person feeling a constant pain that nobody else could feel and understand. But the question I kept asking myself is that does this mean this is of any lesser importance? Watching the story of the three main characters in “Perks” unfolding before my eyes reminded me that those were some real issues no matter from what angle you look at them. The most obvious question for me is if we failed to find our place in the world as we grow up, what would we become? That stormy patch in the sea might look like a small tide in the future, but we ought to surf through that to be able to look back.

I have never thought a “coming of age” film such as “The Perks of Being a Wallflower” would have such an impact on me but here I am babbling on about my toothache teenage years.